About Me

Name: Adam Bernard
Home: Fairfield, Connecticut, United States
About Me: Entertainment journalist with 15+ years of experience. Supporter of indie music. Lover of day baseball, fringe movies, & chicken shawarma. Part time ninja. Nerdy, but awesome.
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July 2010 - January 2013
Tales From A Westport Bar
Saturday, July 02, 2005
Last night, for a night where I had nothing planned, a heck of a lot ended up happening. With not much to do and a stack of DVD’s that was growing by the minute, I figured I’d take the weekend to get a lot of them watched. I had gotten through two and was watching the Mets game when I got a text message from a buddy who was at Viva Zapata’s, a Westport establishment known for killer margarita’s and occasional heath code violations. He said that it was jumpin and I should roll through. Viva’s isn’t exactly nearby for me and I was a little reluctant to go, but my boy convinced me and in about half an hour, after an unexpected detour because I have zero directional sense, I was there.

My boy was right, the place was packed. Some of the girls came dressed as they would normally dress, then there were the girls who had obviously never been to a real nightclub because they came dressed like Viva’s was some chic hotspot. Take it from me, no matter how packed that place gets, it’s still a bar. I feel I can speak with some authority on this subject since I was flipping channels earlier today and caught a couple minutes of E!’s 20 Hippest Hot Spots special. In that minute they happened to be talking about Butter. After a couple seconds of me going "why do I know that name" I finally recognized it as the club where I had my Andy Dick incident. So yeah, apparently I go to the REAL hot spots (though that fact still amazes the heck out of me), and although Viva’s might get packed, and might even have some good looking people there, it’s still just a bar in the middle of Westport. Get over it. Just go and have fun. Oh, and it’s also a pretty safe bet that if a place is advertising that they sell Pat’s Blue Ribbon for $2.50 a can it’s not a place you need to get all dolled up to go to. (Hell, if they have Pat’s Blue Ribbon AT ALL there’s no need to get all dolled up)

At Viva’s I happened to run into a host of people that I knew, including a few I hadn’t seen since graduating from Fairfield Prep in 1996. One old buddy had just gotten back from a tour of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan. It’s always different when you ask someone where they’ve been and they reply Afghanistan. It was real dope, though, because I get very jazzed when I see people from my past and reconnect. Westport, Connecticut definitely has it’s drawbacks, but roots are roots and it’s always very cool to me when those roots come to the surface.

I also ended up meeting up with quite a few lovely ladies last night. Unfortunately my game would be severely stunted by drunk friends who let’s just say were on the other side of smooth as the night rolled on. It was cool, though, I ended up coming off as the smart, funny, responsible member of the group and although the girls all ended up bolting after a certain amount of time they seemed genuinely happy to have made my acquaintance. Had various people not been drunk I’m extremely confident that I would have had a better than 75% chance of getting a number or two.

Then there was the case of the pissy little bitch I inadvertantly ended up talking to. I had been talking with one of her friends for a while and we were getting along great when all of a sudden this pissy girl became a part of the conversation. She made a comment about her boyfriend text messaging her at 7:30 in the morning and I jokingly replied that in my book that hour is off limits. She turned around and started ranting about how her man has to wake up early because he has a good job with a good company and that he’s sweet for thinking of her early in the morning. I smiled and let it slide. It’s kind of funny to me when I’m hanging around non-industry people and seeing what they consider to be important. For all this girl knew her man could have cheated then texted her because he felt bad. And PS, if you’re THAT quick to say someone has a great job their job probably sucks, or at least I’m going to think it sucks because it sounds like you’re getting super defensive over something nobody brought up. Personally I don’t even talk about my job unless asked and even then I don’t give full details. PS II, if anyone text’s me at 7:30AM and it’s not life or death they’re getting cut off, lol.

Speaking of life or death, after leaving Viva’s I had gotten almost all the way home when my cell phone started buzzing. Seeing it was my boy who invited me, and it was two in the morning, I figured it was just him telling me he was making his was out and he couldn’t find me. Well, he’d made his way out, and unfortunately while trying to answer his cell phone in his car he fumbled with the ear piece and crashed into a telephone poll (you hear that big government, the earpiece is more dangerous than just answering the phone!). He needed someone to pick him up. I turned around at the next exit (which happened to be the exit right before mine) and went back to find him. His car was totaled but he was fine, thankfully. After dropping him off by his place I made my way back home, getting in at around 2:45AM. Not exactly the way any of us wanted to end the night, but at least everyone was alive and we got to see some old friends.

With much respect to my homegirl Tosha Makia, who’s having her album release party in New Haven tonight, if anyone thinks I’m going out again tonight they’re out of their minds. I can't see myself hitting any place other than possibly a coffee shop, and even that’s a longshot.
posted by Adam Bernard @ 4:40 PM  
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