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Name: Adam Bernard
Home: Fairfield, Connecticut, United States
About Me: Entertainment journalist with 15+ years of experience. Supporter of indie music. Lover of day baseball, fringe movies, & chicken shawarma. Part time ninja. Nerdy, but awesome.
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Amazon.com Kinda Thinks I'm a Perv
Friday, January 23, 2009

The other day I was interested in seeing what kinds of films, books and music Amazon.com thought I might enjoy, so I clicked on “Recommended For You.” What I found out was Amazon.com kinda thinks I’m a perv.

While looking at my “Recommended” list it became apparent very quickly that there was a common theme in what Amazon felt I’d enjoy – hot Asian women who kick ass. The first four items on the list were martial arts / action films starring gorgeous Asian women, and 11 of my top 15 overall recommendations were action flicks of some kind, most of them starring, you guessed it, beautiful Asian women. The list ranged from the Tokyo grindhouse movie The Machine Girl, where a girl loses her entire family to the Yakuza, gets her arm chopped off, but has it replaced with a machine gun so she can exact her revenge, to the live action version of Cutie Honey, which is about a girl who can turn into anything and is a “warrior of love.” (She also seems to be a warrior of boobs, which I think we can all agree are worth fighting for)

The first question that came to mind after taking everything in was “how on earth did they come up with this list?” I clicked on “Items You Own” and suddenly I saw things a bit more clearly. Although I have somewhere in the neighborhood of one hundred movies in my collection, Amazon is only aware of seven of them. They are as follows:

Yo-Yo Girl Cop – A hot, and extremely tough, Asian girl has to go undercover at a high school to figure out why kids are becoming suicide bombers and what it’s all leading to. One thing it leads to is an awesome fight scene that involves two hot girls in leather using yo-yos as weapons.

So Close – Two gorgeous female Asian assassins, one hot female cop, and TONS of fast paced action.

Vampire Effect – Two cutie Asian girls, Jackie Chan and the undead. I'm pretty sure that's a holy trinity for great movie making.

Dynamite Warrior – An Asian action flick that has great fight sequences, but a horribly convoluted plot.

The Last Dragon – Bruce Leroy faces off against Sho'Nuff, the shogun of Harlem, in one of the greatest movies of all-time!

Gamera: The Ultimate Collection – THREE movies starring Gamera, the city destroying, fire breathing, turtle that can fly! Gotta love a good (or bad) Japanese monster movie.

Dirty Work – Norm MacDonald’s piece de resistance, a hilarious movie about getting back at people who do awful things. Includes some classic one liners.

OK, so after taking a look at that list suddenly it wasn’t all that difficult to see how Amazon came up with theirs, and in reality my initial question of “how on earth did they come up with this list?” probably should have been something more along the lines of “how on earth are they so on the money?”

Yes, it turns out the only truly shocking thing about my “Recommended” list is how incredibly accurate Amazon’s computers really are. In fact, now that I think about it, it’s kinda nice to finally have a place that understands I’m a foreign film buff who respects strong female characters and happens to have an extensive background in the martial arts. (Hooray, I reasoned my way through it!)

So who's up for a movie?

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