About Me

Name: Adam Bernard
Home: Fairfield, Connecticut, United States
About Me: Entertainment journalist with 15+ years of experience. Supporter of indie music. Lover of day baseball, fringe movies, & chicken shawarma. Part time ninja. Nerdy, but awesome.
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Bios: $200-$300
Press Releases: $50

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Popular Columns

The Struggles Foreign Artists Face in the US, & How to Overcome Them


Ten Secrets for Making a Show a Success Despite a Low Turnout


What Happens to an Artist When Their Record Label Folds

Wednesday, March 10, 2004
Fisting a hooker and other new experiences

I had an experience yesterday that (slightly) simulated something sexual; I had to fish a Snapple cap out of the garbage disposal. To me, this was sort of like fisting a loose hooker. Let's look at the comparison. I had to work my hand into a hole that really shouldn't fit a whole hand, but miraculously can when lubed up enough. I slid my way into something that probably used to be smooth, but is now tough and rubbery. I had to be careful once inside not to touch anything potentially dangerous. And, of course, if I turned it on at the wrong time I seriously risked losing my hand. Now THAT'S excitement, folks.

When it comes to work, last night's radio show was a blast. We played the most songs we've ever played during a show, and had fun messing with the kids in the lounge area. One of the kids "accidentally" threw a slipper at the studio, which we thought was hilarious. After the show one of the girls was still there and I spoke with her for a bit. She was perfectly nice, and not unattractive, but she was only a freshman, and it made me feel so old. It's only a seven year difference, but I'm really not in the mood to deal with a student's problems when I have real life ones.

Yesterday I also got an email from the people at Remix Magazine. The email was basically welcoming me to the magazine and asking where to send the tax forms and contracts for me to sign. This is GREAT! It's only freelance, but it's a little extra change in my pocket to pay the bills with. I'm hoping to build up a great relationship with the magazine and eventually get some full length stories featured in it.
posted by Adam Bernard @ 3:34 PM  
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