Sometimes I feel I'm too hard on myself, but I can't help it. I sit here everyday, relentlessly trying to find work that is even remotely close to what I do, but there just aren't any openings. I try not to take it as a personal affront, because I know the companies don't know me personally, but to work so hard at something and to not see the hard work pay off is extremely depressing. I see tons of other job opportunities, but I don't want to stop writing about music, it's what I love to do. Also, at this point in my life I think it would be hard for me to fit into any other work environment. Entertainment is something so different from everything else that once you're in deep enough there's no going back.
One of my friends IMed me today concerned about my psyche cuz, let's face it, I'm not as happy as I used to be. I told her I knew what the problem was, and nobody can solve it. I think that's another problem I have, I can't solve this particular problem myself. If it was something I could just handle on my own I'd be fine, but instead I have to wait for someone else to jump, for someone else to move, and I've never played well with others. :o)
I need to find some things outside of work that I enjoy. I need to spend more time doing those things. There's no point in continuing to kill myself working if nobody is noticing. I did interviews at a pace this year that was unrivaled. I will probably finish the year averaging between 7-8 a month. So my interview count is high (over 125), but my morale is low. I'm going to tone down the interviewing in the coming year, trying to limit the number I do to five a month. I figure that way I'll still be working hard, but not killing myself. Also in the coming year I hope to have my magazine debut. I'm having some issues (no pun intended) with getting a layout program, but hopefully all of that will be solved this month.
Speaking of issues, AOL is giving me major problems right now, so much so that I'm seriously considering switching ISP's. I have a technical problem and not only did their live help not load correctly, but their phone help, which was great a few years back, is now horrible. The tech support guy didn't even know the part of AOL I was talking about, and all four people I delt with had Indian accents so thick they were barely understandable. If they wanted to have people with thick Indian accents maybe AOL should have gone with former Al-Qaida members, at least THEY know how to use computers.
Last but not least, big ups to my fantasy football team, the Gideon Yago-meisters, for making the playoffs! Pennington + McAllister = Wins!
One of my friends IMed me today concerned about my psyche cuz, let's face it, I'm not as happy as I used to be. I told her I knew what the problem was, and nobody can solve it. I think that's another problem I have, I can't solve this particular problem myself. If it was something I could just handle on my own I'd be fine, but instead I have to wait for someone else to jump, for someone else to move, and I've never played well with others. :o)
I need to find some things outside of work that I enjoy. I need to spend more time doing those things. There's no point in continuing to kill myself working if nobody is noticing. I did interviews at a pace this year that was unrivaled. I will probably finish the year averaging between 7-8 a month. So my interview count is high (over 125), but my morale is low. I'm going to tone down the interviewing in the coming year, trying to limit the number I do to five a month. I figure that way I'll still be working hard, but not killing myself. Also in the coming year I hope to have my magazine debut. I'm having some issues (no pun intended) with getting a layout program, but hopefully all of that will be solved this month.
Speaking of issues, AOL is giving me major problems right now, so much so that I'm seriously considering switching ISP's. I have a technical problem and not only did their live help not load correctly, but their phone help, which was great a few years back, is now horrible. The tech support guy didn't even know the part of AOL I was talking about, and all four people I delt with had Indian accents so thick they were barely understandable. If they wanted to have people with thick Indian accents maybe AOL should have gone with former Al-Qaida members, at least THEY know how to use computers.
Last but not least, big ups to my fantasy football team, the Gideon Yago-meisters, for making the playoffs! Pennington + McAllister = Wins!
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