Tips For Cold Weather Club Hoppin


In case you haven’t noticed, it’s officially winter, especially for those of us on the east coast. The other day it looked beautiful outside, but as soon as I stepped out the door, WHAM, I was assaulted by some bone chilling winds, the kind that make you want to run back inside to the refuge of a warm blanket and a cup of something hot, be it tea, coffee, cocoa, lava, anything. We can’t do that, though, because even though the temperature is now sub-freezing at night there’s still plenty to do, like concerts and club events. Just because the sun stopped working doesn’t mean the artists have, too. With that in mind today I bring you the official Adam’s World guide for going out to shows when it’s cold enough to freeze your face.

In every other season going to a show or to a club is simple, you get dressed the way you want to be seen and head out. You can’t do that in the winter, though. If you walk outside in your best striped shirt you’ll probably freeze to death before even getting to your subway, or car. This brings us to an important distinction, whether you are a city dweller or suburbanite. Suburbanites have it easier, wear whatever overcoat or gloves you want, you can shed them in the car when you park. City dwellers can’t pull that off, so it’s time to get realistic about your winter club gear.

Jackets – You want to stay warm while waiting for trains and walking down city blocks where the wind whips so hard children and midgets are picked up by it and tossed around. You don’t, however, want to be sweating like Patrick Ewing at the free throw line while you’re at the club. For these chilly winter evenings you can always try a hoodie over a sweater, which won’t keep you super warm during your walk, but also won’t cause you to sweat your balls off (or whatever the female equivalent of balls are for ladies to sweat off) once inside. You can also try any type of jacket with a decent lining as long as you feel you’ll be comfortable in it, or holding it if you get too warm, at a show. Remember, even though it’s freezing outside your main concern is how warm you’ll be inside. This is why the big bubblegoose jackets are a no-go. You’ll stink like a farm animal you’ll be sweating so much. Of course, a coat check cures all this, but we all know the really fun stuff rarely happens at spots that have a coat check.

Gloves – Yes those gigantic warm gloves that relegate your fingers to borderline useless status feel great, but they’re all wrong if you’re walking to the club. The thinnest gloves possible that will still keep your hands warm are what you want. Why? Because when you get in the spot you can take them off and shove them in your coat pockets. Leave the massive gloves at home for when you need to shovel snow, fight a serial killing snowman, or playfully throw a snowball at an ex-girlfriend in jest only to have her then swing at you with a snow shovel… err, let’s move on.

Head & Neck Gear – If you’re anything like me your ears are especially susceptible to the freeze of winter’s icy chills. A knit hat, however, is out of the question. When you take it off you look like a kid who didn’t comb his hair before going to school. Earmuffs are an option, as are the ear cover/warmer headbands. Yes, you may look foolish while walking down the street, but you’ll be warm and once you enter the club and take whatever is protecting your ears off you’ll look good at the spot, and isn’t that what matters? Also remember scarves are good options, as well. You can always unwrap them when inside.

Timing - Finally, not that this is ever an issue with most folks, never show up on time. Fashionably late is the new on time when winter comes along. You do not, under any circumstances, want to be stuck waiting in a line when it’s twenty degrees.

I hope some, or all, of this post has been helpful to those heading out to brave the frigid nights of winter. Keep hitting up those shows!

Comments

Unknown said…
Adam, Adam, what are we going to do with you? You seemed to have forgotten the most important part. Copious alcohol consumption does wonders for creating the illusion of warmth. And if my life experience is any indication it definitely contributes to being "fashionably late". Hot Toddies abound!

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